urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee fate is an elegant cold-hearted whore. fate is an elegant cold-hearted whore. 2006-04-14T06:51:04Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:10767 2006-04-14T06:51:04Z 2006-04-14T06:51:04Z who am i kidding? hahahaha. life is too much for me. i can't freaking handle it! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:10631 2006-04-04T06:00:20Z 2006-04-04T06:00:20Z :) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:10439 2006-03-21T05:45:51Z 2006-03-21T05:45:51Z spill canvas. "In one fell swoop it became clear to me that I despise you entirely but the good news is, I'm gonna keep you around 'cause your lust is just convenient now.<br /><br />and all at once it became clear to me that you're allergic to honesty. and you don't even have a friend around. and my lust is just convenient now."<br /><br />why do I want to be with someone that can't even tell me the truth? someone that only wants to be with someone else? who would honestly find love in someone that is as indecisive as you? i'm so blind, but so are you, to the pain you are putting me through. stop playing games. the game's over. and you just lost. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:10007 2006-03-18T08:37:30Z 2006-03-18T08:37:30Z savage garden. i'm done. i'm done looking like an idiot and feeling like an idiot because you are convinced that i don't have any feelings. you're wrong. i have more feelings and more of a heart than you will ever know. and the minute you're out of my life, the minute my life will make a 360 and change for the better. i don't know why i bother anymore. i don't know why i torture and hurt my own heart when i know yours doesn't give a SHIT about mine. and about how i feel. all you care about is yourself and your new best friend, that you so graciously replaced me for. even though you will never meet anyone like me, ever. i'm the best thing that ever happened to you. you wouldn't be the person you are now if it weren't for me, even though you are way to stubborn to admit it.<br /><br /><br />fuck. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:9810 2006-03-17T03:44:34Z 2006-03-17T03:44:34Z <font size="6">I GOT MY LICENSE!!!</font><br /><br />eeeeeee! happy noise. mmmm today was a good day. i love today. &lt;3 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:9616 2006-03-16T07:29:52Z 2006-03-16T07:29:52Z dangit! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:9468 2006-03-13T02:20:48Z 2006-03-13T02:20:48Z rent. umm duh. okay, so i changed my mind. so much amazing stuff is going on my life right now, i love it.<br />so about year ago this month, i became an eff-ing science experiment. i'm sure you livejournal-ists remember reading about it. that stomach problem i had that NO ONE could figure out? dun dun dun; it's back. sweeeeet. jay-kay. anyway, my mom is convinced that this sickness is my thyroid. i don't know, i'm getting checked out again this weekend.<br />OH, so last friday i tried out for cats, not exactly expecting to get a part but saturday afternoon i received a phone call from mr. ball offering a part to me. I WAS SO HAPPY! i have a danching role, but that's exaclty what i wanted. sarah and vince and katie and andy and charles and all my best friends got amazing roles and i'm EXSTATIC for them. :) so today, my dad came up to me with a flyer saying that cats is coming to vegas in june and he's going to buy all the people i named tickets to see it. eeeeee! (happy noise.)<br />btw, don't see the hills have eyes. that's all i have to say about that.<br />last night hayley, nina, judi, alexis, beanie and i decided we wanted to pie our best guy friends in the face at the basketball game. so afterwards, we all ran around the grass area in the gym throwing pies and cool whip and shaving cream at each other. amaaaaazing. funniest night of my life. i love my friends. &lt;3<br />OH AND I GET MY LICENSE THURSDAY. "if i pass". thanks friends. ahahah<br />becca's birthday was yesterday. gina and i surprised her and took her to BJ's for lunch with some of her closest friends. it was funnnn. happy birfday becca boo ! :)<br />i miss shelby. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THIS SUMMER. she might come out here! but only if justin comes, so i have to convince him, then it will be noooo problem. adam jones is in love with shelby. it kind of makes me laugh.<br />ooooooh boy, life is good.<br />dang, this is a long entry. i feel really sick right now, so i'm going to get a thousand blankets and bundle up because i'm FREEEEEZING and watch my favorite movie, which you probably won't even need to ask what it is. :) ahahah, love yous. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:9127 2006-03-10T00:01:58Z 2006-03-10T00:01:58Z black eyed peaaaaaas! i don't feel like updating on everything going on my life. i think i'm going to take a break from livejournal because all i ever do is vent, and it's gay. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:8817 2006-03-02T00:28:52Z 2006-03-02T00:29:22Z fray. where did i go wrong? i lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness, and i would have stayed up with you all night had i known how to save a life.<br /><br />let him know that you know best, cause after all you do know best. try to slip past his defense, without granting innocence. lay down a list of what is wrong, the things you've told him all along. and pray to God he hears you.<br /><br /><b>pray to God he hears you.</b> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:8654 2006-03-01T04:49:03Z 2006-03-01T04:52:43Z weird song in FD3! life is confusing.<br />after school today, i BSed a chemistry quiz in ten minutes then went to cheer practice for like, fifteen. sweet? rachel and i went to her dads office and gossiped with him and his co-worker for a good half hour. then greg and devon met up with us at TPC for lunch. and at 5:45 devon and i went to see final destination 3. ooooh mannnn, that was eff-ing intense. i love how i had such a fun day today and it's tuesday. as devon would say, "tuesday is the new friday." ahahah.<br />i went to kfc with alex and dad for dinner. and it was really cool when alex bit into her mashed potatoes and found a ginormous piece of glass. LAW SUIT, WHAT? hahaha thanks hay.<br />so, i think i'm dying my hair brown. yes or no? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:8299 2006-02-28T02:23:59Z 2006-02-28T02:23:59Z american hi-fi so last night i decided to have a complete anxiety attack and freak out. i've probably never cried so hard in my life, for no apparent reason. i was so hysterical that i called the last person that i would ever imagine myself calling; bill. yeah, i know, i know. i'm just getting myself wrapped up in something that won't ever work out, but i needed to talk to the one person that i trust my entire life with. the person i feel the safest with, the person that i will always count on to be there for me, no matter what it is. i think he's coming out here this summer. he is my best friend and i love him so much.<br />i have a cheerleading competition on saturday, and i'm freaking out. we're not 100% as ready as we could be, but i'm still excited. another weekend away from the pain and torture that i know in my heart <b>i don't deserve.</b><br />i can't wait until this school year ends. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:7955 2006-02-26T22:13:06Z 2006-02-27T03:29:24Z rent soundtrack this weekend was: amazing, brilliant, sexy, fun, hilarious. (according to beanie & i) i can't sit here and describe to you all the fun i had so beanie summed it up for me. readddd --<br /><br /><b>FRScaliLUV017:</b> Beep beep game. 9 Hours Having to go pee. Sleeping on a leg. Goldfish. Scary elevators. The Hot Tub Room. Can I get A Masuse? Hotel room Discussions. Travel Lodge Killers with Puppies. The Wooster baseball team. The Laundry Room. Snow ball fights. Too much junk food. Adventures too Paris. Being a pillow. Johnny Rockets. Yelling really Loud. Candy Land. Gossip. Pictures. Matches. Retarded Showers. Ninja 89. Winning State.<br /><br />despite the fun i had, i hate going out of town. because then i come back and find out about stupid stuff. if that bitch steals my friends, i'll kung fu her ass.<br /><br />but on the bright side, i have an amazing best friend that changed my perspective of this entire thing.<br /><br /><b>DUH ITS HAYLEY:</b> it isn't going to matter in the end. it's only gonna matter how this changed you into a better person. because, when things go wrong it's only a mistake if you don't learn & grow from it. and honey, so much of high school is about getting through tough shit & coming out on the other side for the better. don't dwell on what could have been or should have been. what's happened has happened and nothing you can do is going to change the course of events that has happened. there's a reason for everything & so you're goning to have to take a step back and look at what's going on around you. and i know it hurts & i know it sucks. but, soon you'll look back on this and it'll all just be a "remember when...". it's a life lesson, sweetie. a shitty life lesson, but it's still a lesson. so, be the bigger person. don't let him see that he's won. just suck it up & smile. you have you're best friends by your side no matter what. you'll always be loved by the people that really matter, so rememeber that. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:7928 2006-02-19T22:31:46Z 2006-02-19T22:31:46Z death cab for cutie. last night was, no joke, the MOST fun i had in a long time. sleepover with best friends at caesars. AMAZING. i'm in love with my friends. all night we played games and laughed and giggled and watched scary movies and ran around singing and dancing and played with bubbles and laughed some more. i am so blessed to have such amazing friends.<br />state is in reno this weekend. i get to see best friend! i am so excited. four days away from vegas :) mmmmmm, i'll miss you all.<br />hopefully i can stay at dana's tonight. my mom has been really strict about me not being home. i think i'm going to go clean my room and my bathroom and maybe downstairs so she knows i didn't just sit on this darn thing all day.<br />i love you.<br />each and every one of you. :)<br />especially my sarah boo, because i know she's reading this. i honestly don't know what i would do without her and katie to keep a smile on my lonely face. &lt;3<br /><br />kisses. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:7460 2006-02-15T05:16:42Z 2006-02-15T05:16:42Z spill canvas. ew, valentines day.<br />but it's all okay, because today was a good one. devon was my valentine. aww. he gave me the cutest present, but i can't describe it via internet because it's too complicated.<br />i have more homework tonight than i've had in my entire life. so i think i'm going to go do that. yeah, i think so.<br /><br />moral of the story; i love my friends, i love my family, i love life, but i hate rumors. too bad i went from having no repuation at all to a terrible one. sweeeeet. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:7224 2006-02-12T19:04:55Z 2006-02-12T19:04:55Z the rocket summer so much has been going on lately. i have amazing friends and i never thank them enough. i have so much on my mind so this entry is going to be insanely random. tuesday was brookes dads funeral. it was so beautiful and i have never cried so much in my entire life. for more than one reason. but i decided to be really cool and faint at the burial so i ended up in the hospital for the rest of the day. that was lame. and then i was out of school for two days. but tay came over and watched TBC with me to cheer me up. and we ate panera. life wasn't so bad that day. school is so stressful lately. probably because i missed three days of school so now i have so much catching up to do. our cheer competition is in about two weeks and i'm freaking out. i had to spend an entire lunch period making up a cheer to teach to the other cheerleaders. stressssss. ahh. tuesday is valentines day. my least favorite day of the year. i think i'm just going to hang out with taylor because we both hateeee valentines day. overall, i am incredibly stressed and i need to get away. asap. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:7101 2006-02-06T00:26:16Z 2006-02-06T00:26:16Z natasha beddingfield. last night was the most fun i've had in a long time. and it was something i really needed. life is amazing. i love you all.<br /><br />sarah, i want pictures babygirl. &lt;3<br /><br />:) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:6672 2006-02-02T05:33:58Z 2006-02-02T05:33:58Z nickelback these past few weeks i have been filled with so much anger. but i worked my frusteration out at tumbling today, and whatnot. best friend is coming into town. i am so so so so so excited. i miss my other half.<br />& sadies is this saturday. =)<br />today made me think of cp. brooke's dad died. i have never even met him but it hit me like a ton of bricks. brooke is my friend, and when my friends are hurting, so am i. i love you brooke, and i'm always here for you. you and your family are in my heart and prayers. &lt;3<br />i need to stop being such a bitch. for some reason, when something is bothering me i don't hesitate to show it. and of course i fucked up my friendship with rick, but there's nothing i can do anymore. he doesn't care, so why should i? i feel how i did a few months ago. where i would try and talk to him and he would short answer me and make me feel unwanted. i can't help it if that's how he feels.<br />i'm over it.<br /><br />rick, you're going to regret not accepting my apology. and i'm not going to pretend like any of this is okay anymore. you've screwed me over way too many times and i've forgiven you. it's your turn. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:6648 2006-01-31T06:36:12Z 2006-02-02T05:35:17Z <font size="6">ahhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</font><br /><br /><br />you're cold-hearted. that's all. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:6231 2006-01-30T06:51:49Z 2006-02-02T05:35:48Z spill canvas. fate is an elegant cold-hearted whore.<br />he loves salting my wounds, yeah he enjoys nothing more.<br />i bleed confidence deep within my guts now.<br />i'm the king of this pity party with my jewel encrusted crown.<br /><br />i want to tear apart your room to see if what you say is true.<br />darling, don't you lie, lie to me.<br />i want to break into your heart to see why you want us apart.<br />oh, im scared to death to find out what you think of me.<br /><br />according to you, we don't click.<br />that's a blanant lie and you know it.<br /><br />i would die but at least i'd be free.<br /><br /><br /><b>i'm not sorry.</b> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:5979 2006-01-28T18:04:54Z 2006-01-29T17:45:18Z i hate you. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:5723 2006-01-27T02:24:28Z 2006-01-27T02:27:37Z daniel bedingfield i need you so bad right now, cp &lt;3<br /><br /><center><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/random.jpg"><br /><br /><font size="6">5 / 10 / 03 ;<br /><br />RIP baby.<br /><br /><font color="white">.</font></font></center> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:5615 2006-01-19T06:07:15Z 2006-01-26T05:05:56Z so frusterated.<br /><br /><br /><br />i need a signnnn. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:5246 2006-01-17T23:32:01Z 2006-01-17T23:32:01Z jacks mannequin imma go move in with shelby or gabby, so i can get my ass outta hereeee!<br /><br /><br /><br />why why whyyyy!? haha this is so weird.<br />dana you did it too. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:5044 2006-01-15T02:29:49Z 2006-01-15T02:32:10Z crush - mandy moore. aww<3 today i had drivers ed for freaking 163,673 hours and vince and i went to mcdonalds and took pictures while the 800 year old guy was talking and putting us all to sleep and these two boys next to me were smoking 97% of the time and it was really stupid.<br />and i'm really tired.<br />last night after the game, best friends and i went to bj's for a random birthday dinner. it was cute. they brought me a pazzuki (spell check) with a little candle in it and it was precious. and i took a picture and recorded my mentally retarded best friends singing happy birthday to me. charles and vincent came over afterwards and we took, no joke, the funniest pictures of my entire life.<br /><br />soooo, look.<br /><br /><a name="cutid1"></a><br /><center><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles006.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles012.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br />yes, he's wearing my cheer uniform. HAHA<br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles019.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles020.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles021.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles023.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles028.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles033.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br />hahahahah that's not his leg.<br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles003.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles034.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles037.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles048.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br /><br /><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v284/magclydelicous54/vinceandcharles039.jpg" height="250px&quot;width=&quot;250px&quot;"><br />hahahahhaa charles is trying to poke my eyes out; wtf?!%$<br /><br /></center> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:moeee:4714 2006-01-12T03:42:55Z 2006-01-12T03:42:55Z the used monday was my birthday.<br /><br /><br />it was amazing.<br /><br />&lt;3<br /><br />i love my best friends.